Cocaine? Cake? What?
Let’s back this up. Last week I nearly had an nepisode. An episode meaning my heart almost gave out from receiving not one but two potluck invites.
This is how I feel about potluck’s as expressed to my sibling:
” So, my place of work has decided that we should have a potluck as a social event…
I don’t know about you, but I dislike potlucks for the sole purpose that I am expected to cook. I only think a very small portion of the population, 1% to be precise, actually enjoys cooking up a storm and bringing their goodies into the workplace so their coworkers can chow down on THEIR well crafted, perfectly garnished dishes.
I don’t believe this 1% even tries all the other potluck dishes, no that’s for the 99%’ers who hate potlucks. But us 99% are forced to bring something in anyways and we will stand around the table of food, politely taking a little something from people’s offerings.
I am the grinch who stole office potluck day.
My first instinct was to email you for suggestions on easy-to-make potluck dish that is within my level of skill – level 0.
THEN I had an even better idea, why not just ask you, pretty please, to make my potluck dish for me…in return for…I don’t know! But I could purchase the ingredients and keep you entertained with stories while you use your kitchen, your pots and pans and your expert dinner making skills to create the best potluck dish in the history of potluck dishes!
Now you are probably thinking, “what’s the benefit to me”, I am still trying to work that one out as I believe this plan only benefits me 🙂
Sincerely with much much love, your sister”
Both potlucks have come a gone and no, my sister did not make a dish for either of them.
In fact I missed both events and neither was my doing!
However, being a good sport about the dreaded potluck, I did make Nana’s [cocaine] Caramel Cake for the first one.
I missed it.
No worries, potluck number two was planned for the very next day, saves me washing the pan and baking another cake. And so with much deliberating, I planned to bring along the untouched potluck dish one to potluck two.
Potluck day two arrived. I looked out my window – massive amounts of snow. Way more than New York didn’t get!
I was trapped in my condo. Nana’s [cocaine] Caramel Cake staring me down.
I couldn’t resist any longer. I ripped off the cellophane and within minutes devoured…..that much cake.
*note: there is no cocaine in Nana’s [cocaine] Caramel Cake, it simply enslaves you to devour everything in sight regardless of the outcome…gut expansion.